How good do we have to be? That was the question that confused and mystified me for years. Seemed like I could never be good enough.
Being good as a kid was only a lesson in futility. There was little praise, adoration or recognition. And certainly no guidelines for how to be “good enough.” I began to wonder if good enough even existed.
I used to be a workaholic. Often working two jobs while caring for others. Taking on extra duties at my job didn’t make me feel good enough, and I certainly didn’t get the praise it warranted. It seemed I could never do enough to satisfy the demands of others.
Women seem to be afflicted the most. We carry the weight of our world; family, home, job. Like a field nurse in battle we embody the word “triage.” Prioritizing keeps us sane, barely. If all goes well we fall into bed at night exhausted, to-do lists gently falling off the page as slumber mercifully takes over.
Poor health and dysfunctional relationships often disrupt the chaotic routine we have created in a desperate attempt to survive. That disruption can be the catalyst for awareness and eventual change.
I instinctively knew life was never meant to be a struggle. BUT I had been taught by many well-meaning adults that I must work really hard to be worthy and valuable as a human being. What they didn’t realize, was that they were teaching me how to feel unworthy. In essence, projecting their own unworthiness onto me.
98% of us are walking around feeling unworthy. Why am I so sure? Look around you. The majority of people in the world are unhappy. It’s evident in their actions. (Our actions will always follow our beliefs/thoughts.)
Ask and it is given…
During my evolution from unworthiness to more than good, I asked for help. Not from others. People are but conduits; messengers that bring the answers we need. I prayed to a higher power.
One day, as I was dancing as fast as I could, a friend offered an audio tape titled, “How Good Do I Have to Be?” I soon realized the dilemma I was facing was universal, and negatively impacts many people's lives.
My asking and praying for help opened the door for possibilities. And I was ready, more than ready, to WAKE UP.
Decades of fear, failures, mentors, therapy, and thousands of hours of video and books- habituating new methods of thinking and behaving- have brought me to a place that most of the time feels free. Free because I know I am worthy and I am the one orchestrating my life…
Life gets out of kilter at times, but it doesn’t last long and it doesn’t wound my soul. The obstacles that present themselves to me are but seeds of opportunity for growth and for healing.
It's not what happens to us in life, but how we respond to it.
Your greatest discovery in life is finding the treasure that is within you.